Poems

The metaphysical organs

2012-02-16T22:58:00.000+11:00

The sun shone on the simplicity while our heads were in the clouds
We shared the scent of the breeze while thoughts never brought us down
Basking in the moment, splitting the time into two
The internal clock ticking slowly while the external stayed true
A comfortable silence brew and broke my soul to pieces
A rush of blood through my veins made my heart sound beaten
The gasp of air was only temporary but struck my body down
The pulse was vehement and quick, disjointed my vision
With pure precision I felt I was going to drown
For I can breathe again, only for a moment... A single space in time
Only when I wake myself, resuming the organ which is mine

Sometimes

2012-02-15T20:54:00.003+11:00

Sometimes.

Just sometimes.

Deep breaths

Heavy heads

Flailing in the red

Racing to bed

Sleeping dead

Echoes in my ear drums

2012-02-15T20:52:00.001+11:00

Echoes of voices speak

Words repeat themselves in my canals

Anxiety levels rise

My body is an empty hallway

Heavy eyes, heavy head, heavy heart

Iron lungs, silicon nose and plastic ears

The doors swing open

Everything clangs together

It's noise piercing,

Ringing for days

December - Lydia

2012-01-14T14:39:00.001+11:00

<3 <3 <3 <3 this band so much. Was so lucky to see this live.

________

So it was four or five of everything, as you are no good.

I saw it through the frame and through my face.

Covering my eyes, because we are nothing,

And never quite the same from a black and white summer.

With photographs that showed our rails and razorblades.

I think it cured my pain, again

Promise you will go down my neck.

Just like those pills and your cigarette

So as my fingers curl,

I move my lips just so you wont have to.

Damnit you clever girl,

Your style is keeping us from sleep.

It's one more and I'm free,

Oh we've been so lucky,

Yeah we've been so likely to lose.

So give in, let's give in

It's all suicide if I hide.

Because you are everywhere I look and in my skin.

I taste your neck and lips just from breathing in.

Let's call it off kid.

But through the window you reach for the cold.

But the door is so much closer,

And the sun has sold itself to the land

And all over my skin. No! No!

Stop it, stop him

So what, so what, we all were all afraid.

So this I swear I know, it's not the chemicals.

You are off my mind I finally got away.

You said it's such a life to remember,

So come on, and we'll sleep away December.

It was you, bringing your white company.

Bringing the night so it seemed.

And we will never sleep again.

So as you walk through the door,

And yell I'm never coming back here.

It's over we are still nothing.

Three

2012-01-09T02:54:00.000+11:00

Nearing three
Close to sleep
Crawling deep
Music steep
Thoughts weep
Text is cheap
The feelings seep
The heart beats
Let my breaths free
Time passes, I see
That it is now past three

Untitled

2011-12-06T22:58:00.000+11:00

Again again, just again again
One breath right in front of the other
Always out of reach, making myself
Strain over the brain, then it stops.

Untitled

2011-11-07T23:21:00.001+11:00

It is the schema, so closely followed
But for a moment shattered, gone
The string that supplemented the time was cut

And flung into a new dimension

Lost in the amplitude, entwined in the nothing

The script never followed either

It jumbled into pieces, destroyed,
burned
Gone.

Untitled

2011-10-22T11:56:00.002+11:00

So I've hit an impasse

A wall, built with concrete

Laced with cyanide

Smelling of frustration

Intangible mastication,

Waiting, for the inevitable

Negativity trapped in my shell

Twisted Ambiguity

2011-10-21T00:36:00.002+11:00

A twisted ambiguous fantasy

Emancipating the 'self'

The process delaying

Can turn back at any moment

The flow is jilted

The jilting is delayed

The delay is stopped

The stopping is insane

A twisted ambiguity

Oh the sheer irritation

Self inducing insomnia

With imaginary neural immolation

inhalation

2011-10-21T00:13:00.002+11:00

Fresh like effervescence

Inflaming of the nostrils

Inhaling the scent

It lingers

A whiff induces a coma

A sniff kills from within

A breath takes itself away

Feeling like a brutal sin

Untitled

2011-10-11T23:41:00.002+11:00

Breath completely taken away

Replaced by machine

Artificial breathing

Fake air it seems

Lungs never full

Inhalation never pure

The eyes gazing and dazing away

Painted with regret at their core

The frustration built up

A fitting reunion

Denying, seeing a blur

Heavy breath, ending then.

Daisy - Brand New

2011-10-02T15:07:00.001+11:00

Been repeating this all day.

_____________________

And we sing this morning that wonderful and grand old message

Well, I don't know about you, but I never get tired of it

Number 99: Just as I am

I'm a mountain that has been moved

I'm a river that is all dried up

I'm an ocean nothing floats on

I'm a sky that nothing wants to fly in

I'm a sun that doesn't burn hot

I'm a moon that never shows its face

I'm a mouth that doesn't smile

I'm a word that no one ever wants to say

I don't wanna be

He wasn't finding anybody when he was on a shelf

I saw him in my dream

I'm a mountain that has been moved

I'm a fugitive that has no legs to run

I'm a preacher with no pulpit

Spewing a sermon that goes on and on

Well if we take all these things and we bury the past

And we'll pray that they turn to seeds, to roots and then grass

It'd be all right, it's all right

It'd be easier that way

Or if the sky opened up and started pouring rain

Like he knew it was time to start things over again

It'd be all right, it's all right

It'd be easier that way

(Don't mean a thing)

Well if we take all these things and we bury the past

(But you won't go in the ground)

And we'll pray that they turn into seeds, to roots and then grass

(You won't take steps towads the light)

It'd be all right, it's all right

(Feel the flow)

It'd be easier that way

(Don't say you won't get scared and leave)

Or if the sky opened up and started pouring rain

(And don't you mention all the good there would be)

Like he knew it was time to start things over again

(Don't say he's alone)

It'd be all right, it's all right

(Feel the flow)

It'd be easier that way

Untitled

2011-10-01T00:08:00.002+10:00

I seem to write best when I'm like this so here goes:

____

You try not to give

Yet the voice inside tells you so

The instinct to not care

You keep giving and giving though

You wish to not be there

Give in give in

Crawl back to the darkness

Hide within the hole again

Feigning all attempts for caress

Wallowing in nothing but pain

Enter in, it is waiting

Sinking in again, falling deep

"I don't wanna fuck this up"

Yet again and again falling steep

Deep within the hole gasping to wake up

songs

2011-09-15T19:42:00.002+10:00

All these songs they start to make sense

Their meaning becoming clear

Phrases, lines once spoken, sung

Become apparent to me here

Vibrations echoing through the air

Piecing together the structure

Creating apparent meaning

Yielding no meaning after

Second

2011-09-08T22:17:00.002+10:00

The breeze flew through and through

Infused with every memory of you

The sun shone with pure radiance

The grass looking so green

Questioning life, death and everything in between

The familiar feeling

The deafening silence

The sound of my heart beating

My soul burning from the inside

I miss you,

I love you,

Rest in peace,

Your friendship was true,

Your love was pure

Two years,

I'm still thinking about you

Re--

2011-08-24T17:42:00.001+10:00

Rehash, reuse
Retain, refuse
Excuses excuses, I keep repeating
Knowing one day they’ll keep revealing
Please excuse me while I am retreating
Until the truth is all that is remaining.

I

2011-08-17T20:10:00.004+10:00

I think, I feel I doubt

I am positive

I am negative

I am innately evil inside out

I am exquisitely good throughout

But what am I,

For I am I

I cannot define I

Yet I defines me

I is the centre of my mortal existence

I is the centre of my immortal existence

I is external

I is internal

I am not I, but I is me.

Untitled

2011-07-30T00:11:00.001+10:00

One day the excuses will fail to facilitate

The actions will purely alleviate

All with intentions that are innate

Making the whole complete

2011-07-27T18:35:00.002+10:00

I speak words

In hope to meld them into a structure

A poem,

Before I can make sense of the blabber

that goes on,

I'm shut down

"I ask for clarity

As the haze clouds the thoughts

I ask for rationality

As I'm blinded"

The Cascade - Moving Mountains

2011-07-25T19:17:00.002+10:00

Amazing Amazing song. Gosh. Shame nobody has heard of this band.

___________

Well I hope that you know,

That you died in my dream

We were both in the grass,

When the wind took you and put you in my past

So just breathe,

Hold it in and think of me

Just don't fall back

So carelessly

When everything is forced to fall in place,

I'll find my own - you'll find your own - embrace

And the worst thing of all,

Was that I couldn't fall

When I jumped off those cliffs,

Hoping I wouldn't live

And can I hold on? Can I hold on to you?

And can we both die if the wind is passing through?

So just hold it in, breathe and just think of me

Don't fall back so carelessly

When everything is forced in place,

I'll find my own - you'll find your own own

And the worst part of it all,

Was I could not seem to fall

When I jumped straight off those cliffs

Hoping that I wouldn't live.

Ask

2011-07-21T13:14:00.002+10:00

I ask for clarity

As the haze clouds the thoughts

I ask for rationality

As I'm blinded

I ask for sense

As life never makes it

I ask for the present

As the past can never define who you are

Silence

2011-07-17T16:36:00.002+10:00

It's the silence that's wanted, needed

Itched to obtain and retain

Yet the silence is empty

Not filled with thoughts

Not filled with anything

It is just plain

Filling

2011-07-12T10:30:00.003+10:00

Filling in life with musical notes

Expressing what is refusing to be said

Speaking for itself

Filling in life with distractions

Suppressing what is meant to be said

Hiding by itself

Filling in life with hate

Revealing what is meant to be said

Flaming by itself

Filling in life with overanalysis

Exaggerating what has entered the ears

Worrying by itself

Filling in life with contemplation

Thinking what is meant to be said

Analysing by itself

Filling in life with literature

Words of others defining what we are scared to say

Expressing itself

Filling in life with ....

The undefinable word, truly speaking the unspoken

Speaking for itself?

Infinity

2011-07-12T01:09:00.004+10:00

Trapped inside the glass shell

Sitting and waiting within the abyss

Reflections of himself raced around him

Infinitely perpetuating

All eyes on him, the glass stares

The only way to stop the infinity

Is to close his eyes

Untitled

2011-07-08T20:59:00.001+10:00

Cease infinitely

Writhe continuously

Words destructively

Sheer plasticity

Again and again

2011-06-28T10:07:00.004+10:00

Again and again

Just happening again and again

Moving forward again and again

Stepping backwards again and again

Again and again

Thinking again and again

Contemplating again and again

Silent again and again

Cannot revert back to previous behaviour

Forget the insignificant things

Forget what was the important things

Again and again

Open

2011-06-20T21:02:00.004+10:00

This is probably the most open thing I've ever written, but I know it can undergo speculation. I'm not stupid and I am aware of everything that can happen out of this, and all the interpretation that can come out of it. But the author is dead. Think about that.

_________________________________________

I wonder if you remember, the things that were said

The secrets told, the 'trust' placed, the things set in my head

The late nights, the times where you were completely open

Months on end this happened, and the same thing happened again and again

Reverting back to such immaturity is a slap in the face

As it contradicts everything I ever knew, about you.

Well,

2011-06-14T00:11:00.003+10:00

I try not to make any sort of personal posts here that directly engage with what I actually feel in actual writing besides poetry, but I've kinda just realised that whenever I write things, I write it in such a way that only I understand it. I'm not sure if that's a bad thing or anything but yeah, that's what I've noticed.

Hope you readers enjoy my past/future poetry, and to be honest, I don't know why any of you read it at all. Hahaha, cheers :)

Sanity

2011-06-07T00:02:00.002+10:00

It's undesirable, unattainable

The brain forcing itself into the usual trickery

Of making excuses again and again

Oh when will I turn completely sane

Flood of memories wash away the trickery

Another reminder

Of making excuses again and again

Clearly I am insane

Eyes

2011-06-02T19:19:00.002+10:00

The eyes engulf the aesthetically pleasing

Yet the eyes are blind to important imaginative constructs

Fixated truly upon what the heart lusts for

Whereas every other part of the anatomy is abhorred

Gleaming with crimson red, passion enrages the soul

The small taste of infatuation bears on the tongue

As the heart pumps and pumps filled to the brim

With pure desire, infecting the insides

Eyes

2011-06-01T23:23:00.002+10:00

The entirety of sunrise to sunset

A huge blur

The entirety of sunrise to sunset

Hazy eyes

Temporary insomnia

Wishing, hoping for the temporary rest

Broadway - The last saturday

2011-06-01T22:58:00.001+10:00

This song has been on repeat for a long time. Apologies for the lack of posts, just haven't had the inspiration to write lately.

________________

Lonely hearts
Lose the battle every time
Kingdoms start
With the closest of friends
Maybe I will write someday
About how you all helped me
Get to where I am right now
I have you to thank and no one else

It was the last Saturday my eyes would ever see
We were side by side waiting for the sun to pop up over the sea
And I can't remember the last time I was this happy
Captured in pictures
And building castles in the sand

Lonely hearts
Lose the battle every time
Kingdoms start
With the closest of friends
Maybe I will write someday
About how you all helped me
Get to where I am right now
I have you to thank and no one else

Pardon the selfishness
It was passion
We tried to avoid this reaction but
I was honestly a victim of desire
Hope sick in the least, for something tangible
And I'm making it up as I go

Lonely hearts
Lose the battle every time
Kingdoms start
With the closest of friends
Maybe I will write someday
About how you all helped me
Get to where I am right now
I have you to thank and no one else

Take it from me you are the ones who made me open up
Without your trust, without your hearts I wouldn't be singing this right now [x3]

Wherever I go I'll take you with me
This is my promise to you [x2]

Air

2011-05-15T17:30:00.002+10:00

The cold air flew through his hair

Making his way through the buildings

Inhaling and exhaling

Wandering without a care

Dimness filled the streets

Artificial light filled the air

It's blinding

So very blinding

Immaturity

2011-04-30T02:28:00.002+10:00

Behind the laugh

Conceals a drop of sadness

Behind the smile

Conceals a litre of melancholy

Behind the lies

Conceals a bucket of truth

Behind the eyes

Conceals a burning soul

It is all a facade

This fiction we live

It is all a facade

Our true impressions

It is all a facade

Smiling and laughing

It is all a facade

Inside quietly dying

Exaggeration

Immaturity

Childishness

Nothingness

Basis

Artificial

Temptation

2011-04-26T13:46:00.002+10:00

Temptation is deadly

Temptation is fucking horrific

Temptation is death

Temptation will have your head sliced off

Close close close

Tempting tempting tempting

Death death death

Self

2011-04-18T20:38:00.000+10:00

Self imposed

Self gratifying

Self sustaining

Self breaking.

Time

2011-04-18T20:08:00.002+10:00

I've been neglecting writing lately, it's just insane -_- but here.

_______________

Let time do its work

Frustration is unnecessary

Hold back the temptations

Watching everything, completely contrary

To the innate version of I

Neglecting the persuasion of the will trying

To walk through with such a grin upon its face

Four in Six

2011-04-07T21:51:00.001+10:00

Four in six

Does it need to enforce it even further
How many times

How many

Four in six

Condemned to sheer hell

How many times

How many

Untitled

2011-04-05T19:23:00.001+10:00

A sine wave of emotion

While dripping in pools of bipolar

Swirling into a cocktail of confusion

Intoxicating the brain

Untitled

2011-04-03T18:18:00.003+10:00

"And if i'm gonna talk

I just wanna talk

Please don't interrupt

Just sit back and listen"

Words flying right over

Words dissipating at my ears

Words doing nothing

Words incriminating

"Cause I can't face the evening straight

You can offer me escape

Houses move and houses speak

If you take me then you'll get release"

Minute noises piercing my ears

Gigantic noises savaging my soul

Noises lashing themselves at me
As I'm trying to set my innards free

Curl up in the fetal position

Soaking up the build up of repression

Slowly slipping into a depression

Hoping to achieve a realisation

Cogs

2011-03-30T20:38:00.002+11:00

Screech of the gears come to a halt

The workers leave the building desolate

End on end, working the cogs of the machine

Innate, yet building and progressing from humanity

Staring at the blank building

Workers once do dream

The rust, the faults, the cogs

Will enable themselves again

As for now, the workers stand backs turned

Fire in their eyes, stomach's churned

As the building behind them recklessly burns.

Past

2011-03-27T21:10:00.003+11:00

Live in the distant past

Forget the present

Fuck the future

Such a mentality insisting upon living then

Such a mentality having a firm grip

When the world starts to keep moving on and on

You stay, just stay

We'll move with the world

Revel in ignorance.

Hypocrisy

2011-03-27T00:21:00.004+11:00

Hypocrisy, self indulgence, inherent greed within myself

The wanting of what one can't have resonating within

Questions, insight, wealth of knowledge, insisting upon

Knowing, insisting upon insight, feeding upon his own

Hypocrisy, self indulgence, inherent greed within himself

Speeding Cars - Imogen Heap

2011-03-26T22:17:00.002+11:00

This song just resonates with me.

___________________________

Here's the day you hoped would never come
Don't feed me violins
just run with me through rows of speeding cars.
The papercuts the cheating lovers
The coffee's never strong enough
i know you think it's more than just bad luck

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now, now darling
oh don't lose your head
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

Sleeping pills know sleeping dogs lie
never far enough away
Glistening in the cold sweat of guilt
I've watched you slowly winding down for years
You can't keep on like this...
now's a bad a time as any

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't kill yourself
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..it was a long time ago

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..it was a long time ago

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't lose your head
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't kill yourself
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

World

2011-03-25T22:56:00.001+11:00

The world keeps spinning as we wait for it to stop
A moment of solitude in our lives
Waiting for that one moment
That will never come, just a vision in our eyes

“The coffee is never strong enough”
As the days keep coming
We struggle to keep up
A constant motion in different directions

Nights of pure thought
Days of blinding light
Growing ever so tired
To merely put up a light
To continue forwards
To never look back
To fall asleep at night
To wake up in the morning

Paperthin Hymn - Anberlin

2011-03-23T20:20:00.001+11:00

I don't know why I haven't heard this song before. I love it.

______________

When your only friends are hotel rooms

Hands are distant lullabies

If I could turn around I would tonight

These roads never seemed so long

Since your paperheart start beating leaving me suddenly alone

Will daybreak ever come?

Who's gonna call on sunday morning?

Who's gonna drive you home?

I just want one more chance

To put my arms in fragile hands

I thought you said forever

Over and over

A sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

These thoughts run through my head

Over and over

Complaints of violins become my only friends

August evenings

Bring solemn warnings

To remember to kiss the ones you love goodnight

You never know what temporal days may bring

So laugh, love, live free and sing

When life is in dischord

Praise ye the lord

Who's gonna call on sunday morning?

Who's gonna drive you home?

I just want one more chance

To put my arms in fragile hands

I thought you said forever

Over and over

The sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

These thoughts run through my head

Over and over

Complaints of violins become my only friends

I thought you said forever

Over and over

The sleepless night becomes bitter oblivion

These thoughts run through my head

Over and over

Complaints of violins become my only friends

I thought you said forever

Over and over

These thoughts run through my head

Sleep #2

2011-03-22T21:44:00.003+11:00

String of long days, never ending in his eyes

Pushing his legs onwards and onwards

In such a familiar environment

Not stopping to think, or soak in

The one moment where the walking stopped

The one moment where the running stopped

Where his mind was blank

Was the moment he never wanted, his body sank

Trapped in the depths of thought

Sleep prevailed

-version

2011-03-16T20:15:00.002+11:00

Perceiving on the outside bringing upon extroversion

Living in my own world bringing upon introversion

It drains me

Oh it drains me

Round and Round #3

2011-03-15T22:52:00.003+11:00

His head spun round and round

Never stopping as the incessant popping

Red signs, everywhere repeatedly

Bashing away at his mind

Entering a state of darkness

Living through blindness

Mentally blank

Mentally black

Abyss

2011-03-13T21:56:00.002+11:00

As we gallop into the abyss

Being lost in ourselves the deeper we go

The cries of ourselves echo

Waiting to crawl back out alive

The stench of delusion inside

Growing stronger as we venture inwards

Closing our eyes as we're moving forwards

Wishing, wishing to turn around

Vermilion Pt 2 - Slipknot

2011-03-05T10:42:00.001+11:00

Uhm, wow. =/

____________

She seemed dressed in all of me

Stretched across my shame

All the torment and the pain

Leaked through and covered me

I'd do anything to have her to myself

Just to have her for myself

Now I don't know what to do

I don't know what to do

When she makes me sad

She is everything to me

The unrequited dream

A song that no one sings

The unattainable

She's a myth that I have to believe in

All I need to make it real is one more reason

I don't know what to do

When she makes me sad

But I won't let this build up inside of me

I catch in my throat

Choke

Torn into pieces

I won't - no

I don't wanna be this

But I won't let this build up inside of me

She isn't real

I can't make her real

Have Faith In Me - A Day To Remember

2011-03-04T10:08:00.002+11:00

I don't know why, but this song has been in my head for... Almost a week now. It's great. I love it. Makes me smile sometimes for no apparent reason, and that is truth.

_________

Have faith in me, cause there are things that I've seen I don't believe

So cling to what you know and never let go

You should know things aren't always what they seem

I said I'd never let you go and I never did

I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it

If you didn't have a chance then I never did

You'll always find me right there again

I've gone crazy, cause there are things in the streets I don't believe

So we'll pretend it's alright (pretend it's alright!)

And stay in for the night, what a world

I'll keep you safe here with me (with me!)

I said I'd never let you go and I never did

I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it

If you didn't have a chance then I never did

You'll always find me right there again

I said I'd never let you go and I never did

I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it

If you didn't have a chance then I never did

You'll always find me right there again

They've got me on the outside looking in,

But I can't see at all with the weight of the world on my shoulders

They just wanna see me fall

They've got me on the outside looking in,

But I can't see at all with the weight of the world on my shoulders

They just wanna see me fall

Have faith in me

I said I'd never let you go and I never did

I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it

If you didn't have a chance then I never did

You'll always find me right there again

I said I'd never let you go and I never did

I said I'd never let you fall and I always meant it

If you didn't have a chance then I never did

You'll always find me right there again

I said I'd never let you go and I never did

I said I'd never let you go and I never did.

Experiment #2

2011-03-02T21:57:00.001+11:00

Invasion of a part that was unseen

Guilt races upon me

As my thoughts invade, only to see

Nothing has moved on, it has always been

Oh followers...

2011-03-02T21:55:00.001+11:00

Follow this other blog. It has creative writing pieces instead of poetry, just paragraphs, but yeah, I'm not updating it as frequently as this, but yeah

Here

This yellow background #1

2011-03-02T21:48:00.001+11:00

This yellow background

A canvas, merely a canvas for thought

As this moving objects stops and starts again

This canvas stays

This yellow background

Isn't physical

As this moving object stops and starts again

This canvas stays

Delusions

2011-03-02T21:47:00.001+11:00

Destroy your life with delusions

Gargantuan as they are, inflict poison in your veins

Slowly spreading around your body as it takes home inside the brain

Such a grand scale, they burn and change

Liberation and freedom is the cure for the disease

Typical

2011-02-28T22:27:00.001+11:00

Death

Raging upon

Feelings of emptiness

/Typicalteenagebullshit

Timing

2011-02-19T21:27:00.002+11:00

How Ironically placed

The initial timing of the unexplained event

The transition from one thing onto another

Subtly rising towards what I was previously against

Experiment #1

2011-02-17T23:40:00.004+11:00

Inanimate insanity

Corrosive consolations

Destructive disenchantment

Relapsing rememberance

Go

2011-02-15T00:10:00.002+11:00

Grow a pair

Eat something of substance

Tear your life apart

Fornicate yourself to your ego

Undenying hatred

Caress the soul with passion

Kill off a part of yourself

End it all by losing it all

Dealing with the devil

Promise

2011-02-12T22:11:00.001+11:00

Promise was openly broken

Songs filled with nostalgia

Nights spent wondering

As we're going back in circles again

Faster

2011-02-10T01:15:00.001+11:00

Needing the beautiful rest

While the eyes twitch faster and faster

The heart beating faster and faster

Paranoid kicking in faster and faster

Hyperventilating faster and faster

Everything spinning faster and faster

Paradise

2011-02-09T00:36:00.003+11:00

They laugh at me

Though there is no real indication who 'they' are

Mocking my every move, instigating every action to tear me down

Take another stab at me, please for my sake do it

Dropping my place in this flaming paradise even further

Torturing my burning soul while their hysterics deepen the pain

Mocking me while I close my eyes

Trekking through this flaming paradise

Deeper and deeper inside of it i sink

Where the screams so loud I can't even think

Change of Heart - Insomnium

2011-02-07T23:39:00.002+11:00

Love this.

______________

Spring brought the two together

Married the wind with the fire

Under the secrecy of lush birch trees

Opposite hearts became one

One day followed another

Weeks passed, months lapsed

Until wind grew to a storm

And fire to a burning pile

Cold gust of whirlwind

Fiery flames, burning sharp

Adoration all too strong pushed the two apart

Different from the start

Fate that never was written in the stars

Led to a change of hearts

The fall split the one in two

Under the pouring rain

Dressed them both in loneliness

And led to their separate ways

The fire could not be tamed with the wind

Or the wind suppressed by the flames

As blending the light with the dark

Merely results in grey

Truth #2

2011-02-07T15:30:00.002+11:00

Instilling a bout of truth to the ears

As the sound of truth burns
Leaving nothing left

But guilt

Fitter Happier - Radiohead

2011-02-03T21:55:00.000+11:00

This is what we'll all be reduced to.

____________________

Fitter happier

More productive

Comfortable

Not drinking too much

Regular exercise at the gym (3 days a week)

Getting on better with your associate employee contemporaries

At ease

Eating well (no more microwave dinners and saturated fats)

A patient better driver

A safer car (baby smiling in back seat)

Sleeping well (no bad dreams)

No paranoia

Careful to all animals (never washing spiders down the plughole)

Keep in contact with old friends (enjoy a drink now and then)

Will frequently check credit at (moral) bank (hole in the wall)

Favours for favours

Fond but not in love

Charity standing orders

On Sundays ring road supermarket

(No killing moths or putting boiling water on the ants)

Car wash (also on Sundays)

No longer afraid of the dark or midday shadows

Nothing so ridiculously teenage and desperate

Nothing so childish

At a better pace

Slower and more calculated

No chance of escape

Now self-employed

Concerned (but powerless)

An empowered and informed member of society (pragmatism not idealism)

Will not cry in public

Less chance of illness

Tires that grip in the wet (shot of baby strapped in back seat)

A good memory

Still cries at a good film

Still kisses with saliva

No longer empty and frantic

Like a cat

Tied to a stick

That's driven into

Frozen winter shit (the ability to laugh at weakness)

Calm

Fitter, healthier and more productive

A pig

In a cage

On antibiotics

room

2011-01-31T23:29:00.002+11:00

A room full of history

Not knowing to start

Boxes of intricacy fill to the top

of this broken room

Like a secret room

With contents hidden on the inside

Yet it's exposed for all to see

Music

2011-01-30T20:54:00.002+11:00

Musical notes pumping through my veins

Bursts of inspiration burn my eyes

Until I put the instrument down again

G

2011-01-28T21:09:00.003+11:00

The hawk eyes preying upon every disappointment

Hone in on every piece of sensitivity and strike with sheer accuracy

Scar this broken piece again and again

Sharp the beak is, backstabbing, swooping

Let's take off the blindfold

We'll open your eyes to the world

No restrictions, what you see is what you get

Wide in full view, your own surroundings

"Oh I'll break them down, no mercy shown

Heaven knows It's got to be this time

Avenues all lined with trees

Picture me and then you start watching

Watching forever, forever

Watching love grow, forever

Letting me know, forever."

As I take my first steps towards liberation

Leaving only behind the materialism

Subjecting myself to sheer masochism

Bringing onto the road, the sentiment

A silent goodbye is whispered in my mind

A half-hearted grin without turning back

While a part of this organism waits for a tap on the shoulder

The rest walks slowly slowly away

"Oh I'll break them down, no mercy shown

Heaven knows It's got to be this time

Watching her, these things she said,

Times she cried, to frail to wake this time"

Iconography #1

2011-01-22T23:54:00.001+11:00

The iconography stares me straight in the face

Burning with guilt and resent

Wrong timing as always

It wouldn't be as bad as it is now

Ocean

2011-01-21T21:33:00.003+11:00

Confusion mixed with the questioning of existence

Let the pulses of my brain beat and throb

For there's always the easy option or the difficult one

Here I stand in the abyss of the ocean
As the seas part leaving a gap

Slowly closing in on each other

Rushing through the gap

Stopping to let the pulses get through

Stopping to hold the negativity

Let it close in on me

Just let it close in on me

Let it sweep me away

Let's have a toast

2011-01-20T00:08:00.002+11:00

Let's have a toast to humanity

Let's have a toast to the contributors

Let's have a toast to the innovative minds

Let's have a toast to knowledge distributors

"Let's have a toast to the douchebags

Let's have a toast to the assholes

Let's have a toast to the scumbags

Every one of them that I know

Let's have a toast for the jerkoffs

That'll never take work off

Baby I got a plan

Runaway as fast as you can"

Waiting

2011-01-14T21:55:00.002+11:00

Waiting for the downfall

Waiting for the explosion

Remnants of debris left with the ashes
As everything placed into the building

Is destroyed and turned into nothing

Absolutely nothing, for he has nothing left

Iron & Wine - Naked as we came

2011-01-11T03:33:00.001+11:00

I was listening to this just then, appreciate the lyrics and its truth.

________

She says "wake up, it's no use pretending"
I'll keep stealing, breathing her.
Birds are leaving over autumn's ending
One of us will die inside these arms
Eyes wide open, naked as we came
One will spread our ashes 'round the yard

She says "If I leave before you, darling
Don't you waste me in the ground"
I lay smiling like our sleeping children
One of us will die inside these arms
Eyes wide open, naked as we came
One will spread our ashes round the yard

Nothing

2011-01-08T00:12:00.002+11:00

There's nothing to place in this box

There's nothing to say

There's nothing to express myself

Trying to sieze the day

All these words are meaningless

As they are formed through my fingers

Reminiscing about past, present, future

As everything in my head is lingering

Me

2011-01-06T19:52:00.001+11:00

Eyes start to droop

Hair a mess

Ears ringing

Look like a wreck

Rain

2011-01-02T18:30:00.003+11:00

It pours outside while the stupidest ideas come to mind

Only in my imagination does it happen, yet in reality,

A lack of guts is shown to go through with them

Let the chilly rain drip down my face

Two substances intermixed, unable

To tell apart between the two

A sharp pain at the core

Has been stabbing all day

Wanting to lay down, but i'm too tired

Stabs at me again and again

A kick down there

Struggling to get up again and again

Unending continuation #4

2011-01-02T00:39:00.002+11:00

He waited and waited

For once to conquer the fear

For once to gain the new found confidence

For once, to make everything clear

The glowing aura that protruded

From the face into my eyes

Left a euphoric nature

Ironically now, they're blind

Cycle

2011-01-02T00:37:00.002+11:00

It's the same cycle every time

It's all the same, the process, the ending

It starts the same, and ends the same

This is the cynic in me speaking

As words and pictures have poisoned my brain

Truth

2010-12-30T23:22:00.001+11:00

It's true the observation

To the right holds the tears

To the left holds the happiness

Showing testament to it
Shows the truth in its statement

Wallowing in self-consolation

Visions - Bring me the horizon

2010-12-26T18:29:00.002+11:00

I didn't realise the true poetry of this song until now. It's amazing.

________________

This is a call to arms, so grab your guns and get your horses.
Only the dead have seen the end of this fight.
This is a call to arms, so all you fallen soldiers sing with me: death or glory.

So march with me if you believe there's any hope for us.
I've been hiding in these trenches for far too long.
All is fair in love and war, so they tell me.
All is fair in love and war, so they say.

Come on, come on, there has to be a better way.
Get up, get up, let's leave this mess.
I know a place that we can get away from all of this.
Come on come on, get up get up.

I've been dreaming of us leaving everything and everyone we've ever known.
I've been thinking all these visions must be a sign, so hold on and don't let go.
No, we can't leave till you tell me everything.
So come clean, don't talk in tongues. Talk in tongues.
It's time to bring out your dead.
And the skeletons that you've been hiding.
Tell me everything I need to know.
Bring out your dead. [2x]

So march with me if you believe there's any hope for us.
I've been hiding in these trenches for far too long.
All is fair in love and war, so they tell me.
All is fair in love and war, so they say.

Come on come on, get up get up.
I know a place that we can get away from all of this.
Yeah.

[2x]
I couldn't see a thing till I shut my eyes.
I never knew a thing till I lost my mind.
I would sell my soul to know it all, but I held the keys all this time.

[2x]
I've been dreaming of us leaving everything and everyone we've ever known.
I've been thinking all these visions must be a sign, so hold on and don't let go.

Bring out your dead. [3x]

Unending continuation #3

2010-12-26T18:18:00.002+11:00

He stared outside into the beautiful moonlight

With no hint of artificiality in sight

Only the bliss of the atmosphere lingered in his mind

His eyes were brightly awake, finding the silence inside

We go back in time, triggers galore

We go back in time, a reminder of

We go back in time, he starts to remember

We go back in time, he wants to forget this forever

Untitled

2010-12-26T17:49:00.002+11:00

A surge, a rush

One that previously was associated

With guilt, with regret, with pain

To bring myself, to once again

Enter that world, has confused me

Thinking once again

Placing my insecurities aside

Once again

To face it

And see the light at the end

Unending continuation #2

2010-12-23T19:39:00.002+11:00

An exchange of knowledge happened

Which never happened before

A 180 turn around from the very beginning

Then another which leaves myself distraught

Actions unspoken, words meaningless

Enduring bouts of masochism

Before the bracing of impact,

As i'm free falling, I feel as if i'm living

Self-Conclusion - The Spill Canvas

2010-12-23T14:29:00.000+11:00

Love this song.

___________________

Fade in, start the scene

Enter beautiful girl

But things are not what they seem

As we stand at the edge of the world

"Excuse me, sir,

But I have plans to die tonight

Oh, and you are directly in my way

And I bet you're gonna say it's not right"

My reply:

"Excuse me, miss

But do you have the slightest clue

Of exactly what you just said to me

And exactly who you're talking to?"

She said, "I don't care, you don't even know me"

I said, "I know but I'd like to change that soon, hopefully"

Yeah, we all flirt with the tiniest notion

Of self conclusion in one simplified motion

You see the trick is that you're never supposed to act on it

No matter how unbearable this misery gets

"You make it sound so easy to be alive

But tell me, how am I supposed to seize this day

When everything inside me has died?"

My reply:

"Trust me, girl

I know your legs are pleading to leap

But I offer you this easy choice-

Instead of dying, living with me"

She said, "Are you crazy? You don't even know me. "

I said, "I know, but I'd like to change that soon hopefully"

Yeah, we all flirt with the tiniest notion

Of self conclusion in one simplified motion

You see the trick is that you're never supposed to act on it

No matter how unbearable this misery gets

I would be lying if I said that things would never get rough

And all this cliche motivation, it could never be enough

I could stand here all night trying to convince you

But what good would that do?

My offer stands, and you must choose

"All right, you win, but I only give you one night

To prove yourself to be better than my attempt at flight

I swear to god if you hurt me I will leap

I will toss myself from these very cliffs

And you'll never see it coming"

"Settle, precious, I know what you're going through

Just ten minutes before you got here I was gonna jump too"

Yeah we all flirt with the tiniest notion

Of self conclusion in one simplified motion

You see the trick is that you're never supposed act on it

No matter how unbearable this misery gets

Unending continuation #1

2010-12-23T00:06:00.002+11:00

From the day dot, a call was made

Negative four, under the starry night

Glanced up at the gigantic structures

Thoughts corroding my head while I close my eyes

Fast forward, a call was made

Positive unknown, under the starry night

Glanced at the exquisite scenery

Thoughts burning my head while parts of me die

Day

2010-12-21T13:59:00.002+11:00

Exquisite places, lovely atmospheres

Dreaming one day, just one day

Surprises, improvisation

Dreaming one day, just one day

Cushion

2010-12-18T12:15:00.001+11:00

Clasping the cushion

Falling into a shallow sleep

Trapped somewhere between awake and sleep

Insomnia while the subconscious is still awake

Schism

2010-12-18T00:19:00.001+11:00

Immolation, masochism

Secretly we're all one

Self infliction, ensuing schism

One day shall be enough

S

2010-12-16T23:19:00.002+11:00

The best words are excreted from my mouth

In a manner like this, in a state like this

Triumphing all over everything

Wallowing in non existent bliss

"One more nail in the coffin
One more foot in the grave
One last time i'm on my knees

As I try to walk away"

Sometimes trekking through the cold

Can never be consoled by a warm cup of tea

Developing immense hypothermia

While feeling a burning sensation inside me

Watching it all melt and decay

From the inside and the out

Telling me to stop walking

While the words cannot escape my mouth

The freezing moon diminishes my capacity to think

While the blistering heat erases any logical thought

The humidity leaving my body content

Confused always, my mind raught

"We all have our horrors and our demons to fight

But how can I win, when I'm paralyzed?

They crawl up on my bed, wrap their fingers 'round my throat

Is this what I get for the choices that I made?"

Insert the camera inside the cranium

Monitor the impulses, ensuing an aneurysm

It's haunting, entirely haunting

Petruding my soul with guilt

I'm screaming from the inside

Quiet outside

My voice yells the loudness of a thousand nails on a blackboard

Nevermind

Self conclusion, as there always needs to be an end

Mending every little cut and bruise, as I tend

To move forward and forward, while leaving no

real conclusion, as the poem keeps on flowing

and flowing, and flowing, and flowing

until the very end

ATAR

2010-12-16T11:28:00.001+11:00

To define myself via a number
is horse excrement

Yet i'm ecstatic

Couldn't be happier

Thought Police

2010-12-14T23:27:00.001+11:00

Thought police entering my brain

Siezing my thoughts, leaving me in a prison

So much guilt, So much guilt.

Light

2010-12-13T18:03:00.003+11:00

Light is ever beaming through

To be delayed later and later

Prolonging the vibrant Sun

Infecting all being with its brightness

It feels infectious

Light ever gleaming from the sky

As it turns into night, it's still beaming

It's still gleaming

It's still bright

So very bright

Untitled

2010-12-12T23:11:00.002+11:00

To capture the sheer intensity

Of the words spewing from my convulsing mouth

Would be impossible due to the incessant beating

Of an object called the heart

"Get the fuck up, keep going"

Is all it said.

"This time, this fucking time"

Is what was previously said

"Fuck it"

Is what it will say in the future

As the words tremble from my lips

The feelings are mumbled

As the teeth are grinding onto one another

Ever knowing, ever seeing

Untitled

2010-12-09T13:25:00.002+11:00

This talk of it reeks of horrible memories

The time spent, the amount of hours

They go on and on, ever afraid to fall back

Because a repeat may happen

How can I resist the colourful environment

The lush landscape, the vibrant characters

Yet a shadow of despair casts itself over it all

Inducing a bout of nostalgia and regret

This Bitter Pill

2010-12-09T13:17:00.001+11:00

I've been completely and utterly addicted to this song for the past day. I don't know. It speaks volumes.

This Bitter Pill - Dashboard Confessional

______________

Walking away

It's not the same as running

Is it to you now that you've run in this ground

And you say take this

This medicine is just what you deserve

Swallow, choke, and die

And this bitter pill is leaving you

With such an angry mouth

One that's void of all discretion

Such an awful tearing sound

With it's measure only equal by the power of my stare

Glaring over you and over you this feeling of despair

Is never wearing out

It's wearing off

And it's leaving you with such a heavy heart

And a head to match

The bottle is waiting

The cap is twisted begging to be used

And so are you.

And this bitter pill is leaving you

With such an angry mouth

One that's void of all discretion

Such an awful tearing sound

With it's measure only equal by the power of my stare

Glaring over you and over you this feeling of despair

Is never wearing out

Melancholy

2010-12-08T21:56:00.000+11:00

Another old one. Sorry, i'm digging up gems all tonight.

__________

Drip by drip
The water falls from the tap
Slowly slowly
One by one

The lamp shade shakes
Rustling of the wind
Oblivious to anything around it

Rain pours from the skies
Onto my cold head
The sky is clouded
Forever grey

The street lay dead
As if nobody inhabits it
Silence roams now

Fluorescent lights
Reflect off the puddles
Portraying a picture
Distorted by rain

The cold night
Where silence roams
Street light flows
Rain Drops
Melancholy lives

Me Vs Me

2010-12-08T21:30:00.003+11:00

Wrote this a long time ago, I was reading my collection of poems over the past few years and I struck this gem, again, not explaining, but it's a nice reminder.

___________

It's been a while
Still you're striking me subconsciously
I thought you were gone
Yet the thoughts poison my brain

Left me staring at an empty box
Just knowing i'll be pushed down to that low level again
That level where i'm not returning
That level where I turn myself to nothing.

Can't you just leave me be?
Whenever I turn a corner a thought is there
Just dangling in front of my face
You are a demon.

You found me
You took bits of me
You tore them apart
I hate you.

The day I see you
That lucky day
Even you know
That something bad will happen.

You linger in my head
You linger on this screen
You linger within this text
You linger wherever I go.

I know you're just smiling
An insult to everything
I know you're happy
While i'm not.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A polar opposite occurs
I lay here in awe
Letting the warmth of my sheets
Drown me in happyness

I'm left smiling here
I'm left happy
I'm left wallowing in joy
I'm left being me

Every thought
Fills my heart with warmth
Even when my days
Are pitch black

The days that i'm left
Could be the darkest of them all
I'm left
Laying in cynicism

I've dug a hole
Inside my mind
I crawl up
and wither inside

You linger in my thoughts
You linger in my heart
You linger in my darkest hours
You linger in me

You make me smile
You make me laugh
But...
It turns out the same way.

Over
And
Over
Again.

This

2010-12-08T20:27:00.002+11:00

This inability to understand

This incapacity to do a thing

This doubtfulness incessant in my head

Just like before

Irony

2010-12-07T18:27:00.003+11:00

Searching down the road

Making our way through the unbearable heat

It's a reminder of before, fighting the insecurities

Lies, a hint of questioning takes over the brain

Everything turns out fine, we hope. Feel no guilt please.
^
^
^
^
:)